[Aug 26] On her own [Open]

Aisha is quite lost in thought as she thinks about everything and finally has the downtime to think through things when her thoughts are interrupted. She startles a moment and looks up to see Exo. She stands with a smile brushing off her worries.

"Good evening dear. Please sit. How are you?" It is obvious she isn't quite sure how to act all of a sudden with him here. Her mind races, did she bow? Did she kneel at his feet? Did she sit where she was? She vaguely remembers Mary and her lessons and the bond seems to spark but she seems to fiddle for a moment looking at him for some sort of a guidance.

She smiles softly and takes his hand as they walk.

"Just okay? Is something on your mind?" her nerves seemed to settle a little as she was around someone familiar. It eased her mind to know she wasn't alone here.

She followed him into the room and when he sat she stood there feeling a bit out of place.

"I do hope I am not the reason." she says quietly. "Though I came for much the same reasons. Trying to sort things out and find myself now in this new life." she takes a sip of her drink still unsure what to do as her mind nags at the various things she had been taught or told and everything seemed to sound all perplexed in her mind and she couldn't quite clear her thoughts.

She didn't quite know the how to answer the question. She heard it, knew that was one of the many things going on in her mind but she didn't answer right away. She sort of just stared into his black inky eyes.

Finally after several long moments of silence she answered. "Well yes. I am." she replies.

She caught the smirk for him and couldn't help but smile back. She still didn't move right away but when she finally did. She sat next to him on the couch. She glanced down at her cup for a moment just staring into the liquid.

She looked up and met his eyes again. "So what has been on your mind?" she asks as she fiddles with the stem on the glass in her hands still feeling uneasy for some unknown reason.

She listens as he speaks. "I did tell David that echos made no sense to me when I was a witch." she chuckles softly. "I have spoken to David. But he is a busy man. Pack, band, things piled up while he was away and he has to get things in order."

She takes a sip of her drink. "I've just been feeling on the outside watching all the interactions of him and the pack mates and it makes me feel a bit lonely. To not have whatever it is they have with each other. I love him and I don't regret my choices, I just need to find my place among the already formed group that they are and I am struggling with it. Along with other things." she was being truthful in it all. Thoughts she had written down in her journal about wanting to feel more apart of everything. She forced a sigh and leaned back against the couch.

"They are not your problems though. I just need to find my resolve, set up new goals for my life and find where I fit into everything."

"I appreciate that." she said with a soft smile. "I'm finding it difficult but I am trying." she then looks into his eyes and pulls out the leather throng around her neck, the black onyx cross at the end. "I have come to one conclusion. That Shiva is my mortal life, I left the statue behind. I think it is better that way. I am choosing the sect and their beleifs and history." she says witha smile before tucking the cross away.

"It was one of a few choices I made since going to New York and one I am happy with."

"Time does change all." she sips her glass and looks away for a moment her mind thinking about what to do with herself.

Then another thought. "Do you ever get jealous?" she looked to him.

She chuckles softly. "Of other people. Like I find myself severely jealous of the fan girls all over my husband. My sire."

She sighs softly. Looking into his eyes. "Why can you not address it? If it bothers you so? I've tried to address the issue but find I only come out angrier."

Aisha closed her eyes for a moment and then sat up and looked at him. "So you are saying then I should allow his dallies? Let him run around with whomever he chooses?" she threw her hands up and huffed standing with her glass.

"Why should I allow that? He brought me into this life to share it with him. Not for him to go run around flaunting it at any fan girl panty dropper that wants to bed him." she drinks a much larger sip of her glass.

"So then I should feel as though his fans are beneath me? That they aren't worth the time I give them worrying about such things?" she runs a hand through her own hair and turns and paces a moment.

"What happens if I am not enough? What if he want's another childe?" she can feel herself becoming a bit emotional. "I am not the sharing type with him. I doubt he is with me. We have both seen his reactions." she laughs a bit. "Who could you be possibly jealous of? You just said you weren't jealous."

"I would be concerned as well if every childe feels as I do about my Sire then I can understand where you are coming from." she sits back down and takes another sip.

"I will when when we have time. He is so busy getting things in order from being gone so long that when we do get a moment it is only right before the day takes us. Most nights he is up and about before I have risen." she crosses her legs and lets out a sigh.

She already wrote her thoughts down in a journal. She wondered how he would feel reading them. It was certainly an idea to think about.

"As for the blood." she laughs. "Yes I know. I have to you as well. I can feel it." she shakes her head. "I think he is bond to me as well, we have had nights of feeding from each other. Though is it really feeding?" a question to think over. "I know once we share in the valudrie it will change. At least that is what I am lead to believe. I do wish to share in one with his pack mates. I know I'm one of them, but yet I am not."